I. AM. ALIVE.

[Guest]

Hello Mudbloods, miss me?

[Ravenclaw Mod]

WOAH.
-pokes-
Dude...You're back...
-blinks-

[Cormac McLaggen]

How are the superaids voldypoo?

[Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy]

UH. YES.
I LEFT YOU COOKIES IN THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS.
THEY'RE PROBABLY COLD BY NOW.

[Guest]

I'LL EAT THEM ANYWAYS !

Hi.

[Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy]

OMG AND THERE WAS EVEN AN I MISS YOU SIGN I FORGOT ABOUT UNTIL NOW.

Pansy wanders in and sits a plate of hot chocolate chip cookies in the middle of the chamber of secrets with a note that says "I MISS YOU" and a new giant snake stuffed animal. She wonders why the chamber's been so empty, and why everything in here always falls to shat when the Dark Lord disappears.
BECAUSE SHE MISSES THE DARK LORD AND HASN'T FORGOTTEN ABOUT HIM OR PULLED A LUCIUS OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT. WHICH THE OTHERS SO OBVIOUSLY HAVE, GIVEN THE LACK OF ANYTHING IN HERE.
AND BECAUSE TODAY IS THE ANNIVERSARY OF HIS DEFEAT, SHE DID NOT SUGGEST PICKING A NEW DARK LORD LIKE HIS DAUGHTERS DID. AND SHE TOTALLY WASN'T A NOMINEE FOR REPLACING HIM.*cough*

Yes. I did just quote myself. That happened.

[Katie Bell]

I am glad you are abck, but you seem to have missed uh -looks down- 8 therepy sessinos in a row.... I still get paid for that right?


I mean, HI HI HI HI HI

[Fleur Delacour - Inactive]

HI THERE LORD VOLDY

[Guest]

OJoiagp'sajgas



MY LORD
YOU LIVE
OMG. HI.

[Guest]

Pansy, can I adopt you?

And yeah Katie you'll definitely get paid... in leprechaun gold.

[Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy]

OMG YES PLEASE.
Does that mean I get a bedroom that's cooler than Tam or Dee's?

[Katie Bell]

Pansy, can I adopt you?

And yeah Katie you'll definitely get paid... in leprechaun gold.

Oh HELL nawww! Leprechaun gold ain"t going to fly with me! I did not leave Hollywood for this!

-goes Mulan stlye kick ass all over Voldys butt.-

[James Potter - Inactive]

YOU CAME BACK

[Gellert Grindelwald Inact]

YO VOLDEMORT,
I'M REALLY HAPPY YOU'RE BACK AND ALL, BUT GRINDELWALD IS THE BEST RAPIST-MURDERER-DARK LORD OF ALL TIME.
ALL TIME.

... Hi there;D

[Guest]

aahhahahah RAPIST. YES YOU ARE, GRINDELWALD.
...

Okay. I'm done.

-hides from his rapist-

[Gellert Grindelwald Inact]

... don't think I haven't seen your Grindelwald-hate-gossip as you canoodle with Viktor.

BECAUSE I HAVE.

-anti climax-

[Daphne Greengrass]

OMG YES PLEASE.
Does that mean I get a bedroom that's cooler than Tam or Dee's?

Die, bitch, die.

SUP, DADDY? Hmm... that was late.

*rolls out*

[Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy]

OMG YES PLEASE.
Does that mean I get a bedroom that's cooler than Tam or Dee's?

Die, bitch, die.

SUP, DADDY? Hmm... that was late.

*rolls out*

Dee... you already killed me... so...

[Guest]

OMG YES PLEASE.
Does that mean I get a bedroom that's cooler than Tam or Dee's?

HELL YES IT DOES
You can have the biggest room in the manor.
...mine.

[Daphne Greengrass]

ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL?

WHAT IS THIS? *kicks a wall in a state of teen angst*

[Guest]

QUESTION:
Am I the only one not seeing the Death Eater Headquarters?
Is this some sort of prank?
Hiding my own headquarters from me?
I can't even.


ALSO,
Hello there, Gellert.

[Guest]

ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL?

WHAT IS THIS? *kicks a wall in a state of teen angst*

LANGUAGE. 10 POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR.

[Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy]

OMG YES PLEASE.
Does that mean I get a bedroom that's cooler than Tam or Dee's?

HELL YES IT DOES
You can have the biggest room in the manor.
...mine.

OMR HELL YES.

And.
Um.
They destroyed the HQ.
Because no one used it.
Because my your followers have wavered from their ways.

[Daphne Greengrass]

I'm in Slytherin...
*skips off to die in a well*
*because she's unloved*

[Guest]

Are you saying that while I was on a smashing vacation on the Marshall Islands, my followers left me?

This is just like that time I went for holiday in Albania and didn't return for 13 years.

Unreliable, the lot of you.

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