Re: The Fireplace

[Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy]

Pansy sighed and heaved herself up, going to her dormitory to grab some sneakers and her school bag. The essay wasn't going to write itself, and she would rather just get it over with. Library time.

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

Draco walks down into the common room, holding his breath. He peeked in and didn't see anyone straight away. Thank Merlin... He lay back in his favorite spot on the couch and listened to the quiet crackling of the fire. He was afraid to be around people now. He needed to be by himself. Detach myself. Burn all the desolate bridges. If he was alone, he couldn't hurt her again. It would be impossible. If he didn't talk to anyone, she would never have to hear people talking about conversations with him. If he just stayed away from everyone and hid, she wouldn't need to hear or see him. This was one of the few times Malfoy Manor seemed like home.

[Guest]

This was one of the few times Malfoy Manor seemed like home.

[Just so you know, that was horribly sad.]

Severus walks in, looking confused and frustrated. Seeing Draco on the couch, he thinks that he has to talk to him eventually, so why not now? He takes a seat beside him. "Hey Draco," he said uneasily, not having spoken to him since the other night.

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

[It felt painful just saying it.]

Draco's mind was fogged with anger towards everyone and everything. Granger, thinking she knew everything about anyone. She acted as though she had lived his life beside him. Like she knew what he was going through. She knows nothing. He glanced upwards at the sound of his name and saw Severus walking into the common room, "Hey..." He didn't feel like saying much. Lost in his thoughts, really. The lack of memories from the night he got drunk with Sev, how he had to prevent himself from killing Granger, Pansy. It was all chaotic.

[Draco Malfoy]

[Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[Guest]

Sev didn't really know what to say- he needed to ask him about Pansy, but he knew it was a sore subject for him as well as it was for Parkinson. "You hear about the party next week?" he asked, unsure of where to begin.

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

The awkwardness was already spreading it seemed. Draco picked at a loose thread in his jeans, unsure of how to respond. He hadn't heard about the party, but he hadn't expected to be the first to hear of it. He wondered if he would even attend. There wasn't anything in his life worth celebrating, "No. I didn't know about it, but I doubt I'll be attending anyways..." He stared at the fire. Pansy would be there. He wouldn't torture her by being there.

[Guest]

Severus frowned. Draco? Not wanting to party? Something was definitely wrong. "It's next Friday. April Fool's Day. You should come, Draco. If nothing else, there's going to be plenty of firebeer, to get your mind off things," he said, trying to figure out what had him so down. "Something wrong?" he asked for the third time today. Perhaps he'd actually give him a proper answer without Severus having to drag it out of him.

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

The longing to leave and just head home and be ridiculed by his parents was actually growing stronger. He had returned to Hogwarts only to lose someone valuable to him for lust. It was childish. His parents had been right about him all along. He laughed, "Or to clear my mind of things," He thought about the last time he had firebeer. His mind had been cleansed of a lot of things, but mostly the memories of what he had actually done. He didn't want to experience that ever again. He turned and looked at Sev, thinking there was an obvious answer to his final question, "When is something not wrong?"

[Guest]

"Touché," he replied, still looking at Draco with a frown on his face. "Seems like everyone's got a lot on their minds today," he said, thinking of his conversations with Pansy and Lily. Though, the last hadn't been much of a conversation. He stared at Draco a moment, trying to figure out what to do. He was always terrible at that whole comforting thing. "Wanna talk about it?" he asked. "I'm not the greatest of friends, but I can listen."

[Ah shit. I gotta go, baby woke up -groan- Pause until later?]

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

[Sure! I'll respond though, ha.]

Draco felt a lump grow in his throat. The only person he ever truly confessed his feelings to was Pansy. She knew him the best even if she may not want to anymore. He leaned back against the couch, sighing, "I could probably go on all day about my problems. Rita Skeeter would have a flipping field day," He smirked, "Could you imagine? Draco Malfoy: The Emotional Biography. I'd have to throw myself off the Astronomy Tower..." He shut his eyes, but opened them when all he could imagine was Pansy. He had imagined her reading it and laughing about it with people. He never should have let himself spill so much to her. If he had known he would be a cheating asshole, he never would have - "There's problems everywhere I look, Sev. I can't remember what happened when we drunk. What I said, what I did, none of it. I have stupid, ignorant Hermione Granger telling me that I need to grow up and stop having hissy fits because, obviously, she knows me better than anyone else!" He paused, breathing heavily. It felt better saying even the small, vague sentences that barely opened a crack in the window to Draco's thoughts, "Then, there's the fact that I no longer have Pansy. And that kills me."

[Guest]

[I'M BACK.]

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

[YOU CAME BACK? -fake shock, surprised face-]

[Guest]

Severus wanted to slap himself in the face- really, Severus? Draco's trying to confide and you and your first thought is 'his smirk is sexy'?! He mentally kicked himself in the shin, then pulled himself back to reality. Hermione Granger- god, that ugly little bitch was everywhere today, wasn't she? Perhaps I should add her to my hit list, though I don't think Tam will help plan that murder. Pansy might, though. Severus couldn't help but chuckle at Draco's not remembering the night before, though, even if the rest was depressing. "Er... yeah, you're probably better off not remembering what we did that night," he said, his cheeks going pink as he tried to keep a straight face- something that is particularly hard to do when remembering have one's penis up Draco Malfoy's ass. "Err... right, I'd tell you, but that's probably not the best of ideas... anyway.. MOVING ON!" he exclaimed, his face very red at this point. "Granger- why the hell do you give a shit what the mudblood thinks anyway? It's not like she matters. Pansy, though... she matters," he said, his voice softening at the last words. "I talked to her today. About you."

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

"Yeah, just - let's not talk about that night ever again. I don't mind not remembering it if you're saying it'd be a bad idea, so....yeah. Never speaking of it again!" Draco nodded, running a hand through his hair. He cleared the drunken night out of his mind. He wouldn't worry about it and neither would anyone else. That left - Granger and Pansy, "It's not that I care what the girl thinks, Sev, it's the fact that she acts like she owns this place. Like, because people accept what she is and because she's a know-it-all, people will look up to her or something. She expects me to bow down and submit to her and tell her she's right, especially when I feel she's wrong. She yells at everyone. Even her own housemates. It's irritating, just plain irritating. She's the scum of the world, I swear..." Not true. He, himself, was the scum of the world. Hermione might have come in second. He perked up at the thought of Sev talking to Pansy, even if he knew it probably didn't mean anything. She probably hated him and never wanted to see him again. There wouldn't be good news, but as long as there was news he was happy, "Yeah?" He cleared his throat, trying to make himself seem less eager, "I mean - uh - what did she say?"

[Guest]

"Right. Never again. Nope, never," he said, nodding vigorously and turning more red than Weasley's ears. He relaxed a little after that, and listened to him quietly- it felt good to know he wasn't alone in his opinion of the mudblood slut. "Great! So you won't be pissed when she turns mysteriously disappears, only to be found several months later in several pieces washed up in the Hogsmeade river? Wonderful!" he said, not even sure if he was joking. "There are a thousand things I'd like to say to that bitch, more so now, though. I don't let people fuck with my friends," he growled, remembering Black. Though, if he went after Granger, he wouldn't just leave her for dead- he'd wait until her heart stopped before leaving, simply for the joy he'd get from spitting on her corpse. However, he needed to set his morbid fantasies aside- he was supposed to be talking to Draco, even if imagining gruesome death scenes was more fun. "A lot of things. That she loves you, for one thing. And that she hates that she does," he said. He had no intentions of sugar-coating anything; he didn't see the sense in it.

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

Draco laughed and arched a brow at Sev, "I wouldn't be the slightest bit angry. She deserves some consequences for her actions, especially for the pain she's caused people. If I get to live through the consequences of my actions, she does too. I might even volunteer to help destroy the filthy, little brat. I think we'd be honored for our services. Maybe they'd even give us our own trophy for the trophy room for our thoughtful duties!" He shook his head. He was kidding, obviously. He could never kill Granger if she stayed out of his way. Since they had returned to their mutual hatred, he figured they wouldn't be talking/insulting one another anytime soon. He stared off into space for a moment when Sev told him Pansy's feelings. He hated himself enough for the both of them. Possibly, enough for the entire school to be satisfied. He looked down in his lap before hiding his face in his hands. He had done this to her and now she would never want him again, "She shouldn't love me. I only bring her sadness, Sev. I can't give her what she wants. She deserves better. She deserves someone who won't hurt her, someone who won't cheat on her with a stupid Mudblood..." He closed his eyes in shame, "She should hate me. She should move on and find someone better for her. I'm good for no one but myself, Sev. You know that, I know that, Pansy knows that."

[Guest]

Severus stared at him in disbelief. "Draco, what's wrong with you? Snap out of it, man! Did you get hit in the head or something? Did you forget who you are? You're Draco Malfoy, stupid. The one every guy wants to be, and the one every girl wishes she had. Stop with the depressing bullshit, you deserve the best of the best, and you know it. And if that happens to be Pansy Parkinson, you'll get her back. It just might take a while," he said. He hated seeing his two friends like this, when they both so obviously needed each other. He wished they would just shut up and realize it for themselves, but he knew it wasn't that simple. Draco was still Draco, even if he wanted to be someone else. "You just need to grow up, a little, is all. To learn to think before you do stupid shit. Something I sure as hell need to start doing myself," he added, chuckling at the irony that he was saying that to someone else. Yay! Am I now officially hypocrite of the century? "She loves you, and she doesn't hate you, even if she wishes she did. She wants you to be with her Draco, but she won't do that to herself, not until you figure out what it is you really want. You can't have her and the rest of them- you need to decide what's more important to you. Whether that's going around fucking mudbloods and roommates or being with the girl you love, I don't know. But I do know that she's a one of a kind girl, and you'll never find someone like her." He looked into his eyes, trying to read the truth in them.

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

Draco shook his head in confusion. Why did people want to be with him or BE him for that matter? They wouldn't - or at least shouldn't - want to. Sure, he may look nice, but that was nothing compared to what he lived with or felt. He choked on his words, trying to think before saying something stupid, "I know who I am. Hence, the reason I'm angry and depressed with myself. I'm the person who fucked it up with the one person - the one person I cared about. I got drunk and I slept with a stupid girl I never would have slept with in my right mind. I'm Draco Malfoy, the cheating bastard. I may want Pansy back, but I know what she deserves and what she deserves is NOT me," He turned back to the fire, and calmed himself. It didn't matter how much he loved Pansy or how much he wanted to be with her. It didn't matter that she loved him and hated the fact that she did. He was wrong for her. He hurt her over and over again - in the past and even now, after he was supposed to have changed! He would always hurt her and she shouldn't have to be with someone like that. At first he was going to get up and leave before Sev finished, but one phrase caught his attention and nailed him to his seat, "I'm sorry-what?" He stared at Sev for a moment, hoping to clarify a statement, "You just said cheating on her with roommates..." He ignored the last bit, his mind completely bare and now only focusing on that one sentence, "What the fuck did you mean by that?" He felt panic rise. He hadn't - no, it wasn't possible. That would explain - no. No. He grasped his head, "I didn't. I couldn't have- that doesn't - WHAT?!" He was on his feet now, glaring down at the fire. He couldn't look Sev in the eyes, he was hoping that he was lying, "I know I made mistakes, Sev. I know I've fucked it up with Pansy and I know it's going to take my whole damn life to make it right. She's the only person I've ever loved when I'm sober and I plan on keeping it that way..."

[Guest]

SHIT. I DID NOT SAY THAT OUT LOUD. OH HOLY MOTHER OF HIPPOGRIFFS, I DID, DIDN'T I?! -PANICPANICPANIC- Severus stood up, his eyes wide and his face sheet white. "FUCK! I DIDN'T SAY THAT! UM... I MEANT... ER, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! OH, FUCK!" he shrieked, bolting out of the room. Genius. Genius, aren't you? You'll never look him in the eye again, never! Bloody hell, I need a drink.

[Guest]

[-is laughing too hard to type this into the Daily Reel-]

[Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy]

Whether that's going around fucking mudbloods and roommates or being with the girl you love, I don't know.

[I read this and literally yelled OH SHIT! at my computer screen. *dies laughing* I love you guys so much.]

[Guest]

[hahhahahahaa Pansy <3 Connor, where'd you go, I wanted to see your reaction. I am too busy laughing right now to decide where to put Snape for his panic attack]

[Muffy - Tam - Draco]

Draco fell back onto the couch as Severus shrieked at him. His eyes widened, himself being unable to comprehend all the yelling. Maybe he had misheard him? Maybe Sev was hiding something from him? He didn't know and didn't WANT to know. He watched Severus run from the room, his look of ultimate confusion still on his face.

[Guest]

[Draco is now gone.
Idiot never posted he left.
Just kidding, Connor, ILY.]

Severus slams the door behind him and stumbles towards the stairs. He's still out of focus from the concussion he'd given himself, and he's managed to reopen the wounds from Adrian's knife again, that he'd never properly healed. His robes are spattered in blood again and he is awarded many strange looks. He fails to notice that his hand is bleeding too as he enters his dormitory.

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